


The War

by Gelid_illuminant



Series: Runaways [2]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Daleks - Freeform, M/M, Mentions of Suicide, Possible Character Death, Time War, doctor who - Freeform, ineffable husbands, time lord au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-02
Updated: 2020-01-04
Packaged: 2021-02-27 05:41:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22082002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gelid_illuminant/pseuds/Gelid_illuminant
Summary: Crowley and Aziraphale return to Gallifrey to fight for their people. A continuation of Runaways
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley, Crowley and Aziraphale - Relationship
Series: Runaways [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1586692
Kudos: 7





	1. Homecoming

Aziraphale and Crowley had long since settled into domesticity. It was nice. Sure, they traveled in Time and Space, sometimes they had adventures, but mostly they just stayed in the TARDIS. Aziraphale would read, Crowley would sleep, or he'd care for his plants. Sometimes, one of the plants would get thrown into outer space for not being green enough. They talked about everything under the suns. From Autons to Sontarans, from Silurians to Sea Devils. Almost every day was peaceful, and it stayed like this for years.

And then the Time War came. Daleks, trillions of them, right at Gallifrey's front door. Neither of them wanted to fight, neither of them had the stomach for war, but Aziraphale felt a controlling sense of duty. He HAD to go back, HAD to help, somehow. Maybe he could be there performing first aid, or...or helping evacuate. But Crowley said no. He point-blank refused, without a moment's hesitation. They would NOT be returning to Gallifrey, especially not for this.

Aziraphale obeyed, but he hated it. Hated Crowley for abandoning their world. Hated him for letting their people burn. Most days now, he would ignore Crowley's advances, turn away from his touches. It was torture, but it was all he knew how to do. Each day was a new report on some travesty, some Hellish creature created by the Daleks that had pillaged and desecrated some innocent planet caught in the crosshairs.

One day, it was too much. Crowley entered the console room to find Aziraphale in tears, hands over his face like a Weeping Angel. "Aziraphale...? What is it?"  
Aziraphale looked up, his grimacing face blotched red, eyes streaming. "They reached Gallifrey, Crowley! The Dalek's have breached the planetary force field! They're killing innocent people, Crowley! They're killing CHILDREN-"  
"No. We are NEVER going back. I'm not letting you get yourself killed again!" Crowley clenched his fists so hard that his nails dug into his palms. It hurt.

"We HAVE to! We have to do SOMETHING!" Aziraphale hauled himself to his feet and hurried to the Generation Room. The room where you could make things. Weapony things. Crowley followed him, snarling. "It's too dangerous! You'll die, again and again! This war will never stop and you'll just die for good!" He grabbed Aziraphale's wrist, but it was pulled free. Aziraphale stood before him, trembling with rage and sorrow. "I will NOT abandon them."

He started to type on the keypad, and selected a small, personal blaster. It wouldn't be enough to protect him from more than one Dalek at a time. Crowley pushed him away from the console. "I said NO and I meant NO. We are NOT GOING." He growled, dark and deep and menacing. Aziraphale shirked back in fear for a moment, then puffed out his chest, putting on a display of bravery that he didn't feel. "Then I'll go without you." He went back to the console, printed out the pathetic weapon.

Crowley watched in despration as Aziraphale printed out a medic uniform. He was really doing this. "How will you get there? I won't take you." How he kept his voice from trembling, he didn't know. Aziraphale paused for a moment, then turned the blaster on Crowley. Crowley scoffed. "That won't work, angel. I know you won't do it." Aziraphale sighed, took a deep breath, and held the blaster to his own throat. From the look of terror in his eyes, Crowley knew he meant it.

Wrestling him for the weapon would be too dangerous. Crowley knew he couldn't talk him out of it. He gave up. "Alright, alright...just, put that thing down..." Aziraphale obeyed. He began stripping out of his beloved Earth suit, put on the medic uniform. It didn't fit quite right, it was ugly. The little green crescent moon insignia was crumpled. Crowley took one look at the man he loved, readying for battle, and ran to the console room. He bit his lip so hard that it hurt, trying in vain to hold back the stinging tears.

Crowley entered the coordinates for Gallifrey with shaking fingers. He kept his head down to hide his tears as Aziraphale entered the room. The blaster was in a stupid little holster at his hip. He wasn't ever going to be ready for war. He was soft, he was a librarian at heart. And soon, he would be dead. Crowley swore to himself that he wouldn't let it happen, but he knew it was no use. They would both be killed in a matter of seconds. The console whirred, sounding their death knell.

The TARDIS came to a halt several thousand miles above Gallifrey's surface. There was so much smoke that the continents just looked like swirling grey clouds. A face appeared on the scanner, a tired-looking face with sunken eyes. "Declare yourselves at once!" The face demanded. Aziraphale stepped in front of the screen. "It is I, Aziraphale. Time Lord. I've come to do whatever I can."  
"Azi-Aziraphale? We thought you were...dead, or...gone!"  
"I've come back. For Gallifrey."  
"For Gallifrey."

"Who is that with you, Aziraphale? Huh...it seems your TARDIS is registered to one...Crowley? We banished you! Show yourself!" The face on the monitor was angry. Crowley stepped into view, giving a nervous little wave. "Hi. So, I figure you can lift my banishment now. You guys need all the help you can get. And if you don't, I'm coming anyway. I'm NOT letting Aziraphale go alone."

"That will be fine. We've let plenty of banished Time Lords and Ladies back, for the war. Welcome home, Crowley and Aziraphale." The face vanished, and the scanner now showed the Citadel. Burning. Daleks...everywhere. Citizens running, screaming...  
"Crowley, please." Aziraphale put his hand on the lever that would land the TARDIS on Gallifrey's surface. "We have to do this."  
"Yes...yes, we do."

Once on the surface, Aziraphale grabbed a medkit, left the TARDIS and ran into the city. He lept behind a crumbled wall as some passing Daleks fired. Crowley rushed after him, keeping low to the ground. They crouched there, in the rubble and the dust, not knowing what to do next. Crowley hadn't even brought a weapon. There were blasters strewn about the ground, all next to little heaps of dust. He grabbed the biggest one he could reach and ducked his head out from behind the wall. The Daleks had their backs turned. He fired.

The recoil from the blaster nearly sent Crowley onto his back, but Aziraphale caught him. He fired again, killing two Daleks with one hit. Aziraphale joined in, shooting his awful little blaster like a pop gun. The other Daleks turned to face them and began to fire back. The two Time Lords ducked back behind cover, breathing heavily. They clasped hands. "Aziraphale, what do we do?"  
"We...we fight for Gallifrey." 

Aziraphale took a bigger gun from the wreckage at their feet and dared to fire a single shot over the wall. A Dalek blew up. Crowley could smell its flesh burning. He fired at the final Dalek, it screamed and it was over. They'd killed five Daleks. Living creatures. They were soldiers, suddenly, embroiled in the worst war there had ever been. Would ever be. They were killers. Crowley felt a hand in his, held on tightly to it.

"Let's go where there are people. I have this medical kit, I can help them."  
"Do you have any training?"  
"Enough." The hand was withdrawn. They looked at each other. "Crowley, we can do this. We can survive this." Aziraphale cupped Crowley's cheek, rubbing circles with his thumb. His eyes looked so afraid, despite his hopeful words. Crowley swallowed. "I don't believe you."  
"We have to do this anyway."  
"I...I know, angel. Let's go..."

They slunk further into the city, keeping as close to cover as possible. It was slow going. Every so often they would have to stop as a horde of Daleks flew by. Sometimes there were only a few, and they would kill them. Sometimes there were too many to face. Finally, they came across a family. A father, a son, a daughter. No sign of the mother. All of them were weeping. The little boy had a sprained ankle, which Aziraphale quickly wrapped up. "Go to our TARDIS. It's just outside the city."

The father lifted his son in one arm, and his daughter in the other. He made a run for the next piece of cover, and was cut down by a Dalek's blast. Crowley watched in horror as the children were trapped, for a moment, beneath their father's body. Then he turned to ashes. The children screamed, and ran. Aziraphale fired at the laughing Dalek, while Crowley could do nothing but watch the kids run. The boy was going too slowly, on his twisted ankle. He had to do something but he couldn't move.

"Crowley, go after them, damn you! Help them!" Aziraphale was yelling at him. Crowley finally jumped up, hurried after the children. Neither of them could have been more than nine years old. He scooped up each child in his arms and jumped behind an overturned Transmat machine. They huddled there, in petrified silence, while Aziraphale's shots rang out behind them. More Daleks came, for awhile. Aziraphale shot all of them down. Crowley thought grimly; he's good at this.

Crowley peeked his head out the side of the Transmat. He yelled, "I'm taking them back to the TARDIS! You stay there! I MEAN it! DON'T MOVE!"  
"Only if it'll save my life! Go! Hurry back!" Aziraphale yelled back. Crowley gazed at him for a long second, then he picked up the kids again and hurried down the demolished street, being sure to duck into cover regularly, just in case. 

Finally, after what seemed like hours, he reached their TARDIS. He set the kids down in the console room. "Stay here," He demanded. "And stay quiet. There's food and water, second door on the left. I'll be back." And he had to leave them there. He locked the TARDIS door behind him, breifly contemplated how ridiculous the Bentley looked in this ravaged enviroment, and hurried back to find Aziraphale. But Aziraphale had gone. His stupid little pop gun lay on the filthy ground.

"Aziraphale!" Crowley cried frantically. "AZIRAPHALE!" He dove into a large dustbin as a Dalek zoomed past. He took the blaster from where it hung against his back, fired blindly into the air. He heard a warbling scream, and an explosion. "Aziraphale, where are you!?"  
"I'm over here! Crowley, hurry! PLEASE!" His angel's voice was so afraid, so desperate. Crowley looked around for the source. But all he could see was the Monster.

It was grey-brown, like mud. It was huge. It had far too many tentacles. Tentacles that were flailing wildly, crashing through buildings and sending the occupants flying. It had one, great, bulbous eye in the centre of its hideous head. And it had a gaping maw, full of slobbering teeth. It fixed its one massive eye on Crowley and began to slither towards him. He shot at it, and nothing happened. He ran. He ran and he RAN. Blind terror overtook his limbs and he didn't stop until he was back in the TARDIS.

He'd left Aziraphale behind. With that monster. Aziraphale was dead.


	2. The Regeneration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Crowley realises what he's done

Within seconds, the TARDIS was a billion miles away from Gallifrey. Shallow, racking breaths. His hands, sweaty, gripping the lever. His eyes blankly staring at the glass tube above the console. He'd run away and left him. Aziraphale. He'd just left him. With that...that THING. Something tugged on his sleeve. He looked down to see a little girl's face peering up at him. He sighed deeply. He'd forgotten them. "What? I mean, yes?"

"Where's our mum? Do you know?" Her voice quavered, though Crowley could tell, she was trying to be strong. For her brother. "No, I don't know. I'm sorry." He took his hands off the lever and put them over his face. No. He wouldn't cry. Couldn't cry. He had to be strong in front of these kids. They had no one left. With another heavy sigh, he looked down at the girl. "I'm Crowley. What's you name? Will you tell me?"  
"Giselle. My little brother is Maddox."

Those sounded like modern names. Stupid names, Crowley thought. But he said, "Those are nice names. I'm pleased to meet you, um, Giselle. I promise you, I'll keep you safe." How could he promise her that? He didn't even keep Aziraphale safe. He went to the console and pushed a few buttons, then typed into a keypad. There was a warbling noise and a new room appeared in the corridor. "There, I made you kids a room to rest in. You must be tired."  
"We don't want to sleep. We want our mum and dad." Said Maddox. 

"Okay, um...how do I say this...your parents are..." Dead? He couldn't be sure about their mother. But he'd seen their father disintegrate right there on the street. "Oh, we know about regeneration." Said Giselle. "We're...prepared." No you're not. You never can be. Maddox spoke up, "We have to go back!" Yes, something they could agree on. Crowley once again entered the coordinates for Gallifrey. He'd fled in Space, but not in Time, so it took less than a second for them to arrive back on Gallifrey's surface.

"You kids have to stay here. Promise me you'll stay here." He pointed his finger commandingly. Giselle nodded firmly, but Maddox made to protest. Giselle held his hand and shook her head at him. "This man will find mum and dad, I know he will. Don't worry, Maddox." Crowley's throat constricted. He felt sick. Something was telling him that their mother had died, as well. Utterly died. Then he found himself wondering if Aziraphale had been killed during his regeneration cycle-  
"I have to go."

Crowley ran from the TARDIS and hoisted his blaster into his arms. The suns were up, so he could see a little better through the smoke. The Citadel was a burning pile of rubble. Aziraphale was dead forever. Aziraphale was dead forever. Aziraphale was dead forever. And that thing was still sitting there, in the middle of the street. How was he going to kill it? He couldn't blast it, he couldn't-  
The TARDIS. He would fly the TARDIS into the beast!

"Okay kids, brace yourselves." Crowley gripped a handle below the console. He flipped the lever. The TARDIS launched into the air and began to spin. The two children grabbed onto the handrails and screamed. Crowley flipped switches and pushed buttons, and guided his beloved TARDIS right into the monster's amorphous body. It turned and screeched, opening its mouth wide. The saliva-coated teeth twisted round like a buzz saw. The TARDIS flew straight in.

Deep in the belly of the beast, it was dark and hot and wet. Crowley turned on the TARDIS lights - it appeared as a Bentley with its headlights on. He told the kids to stay inside and wandered into the shadows depths, holding his blaster aloft, looking for a soft spot to fire at. Maybe if he shot it from inside, he could kill it. And then he felt the radiating warmth of Artron energy. A familiar Artron energy...Aziraphale! He was alive!

He was sitting against the stomach wall, knees held close to his chest. In the darkness, Crowley couldn't see him clearly. But he knew it was him. "Aziraphale!" He saw the head raise, the slight reflection of light in his eyes. He couldn't see if he was smiling. Crowley launched himself at Aziraphale, embraced him. He felt different to hold. 'I'm sorry', he wanted to say. 'I left you'. But he just held on tightly and felt his eyes stinging. A gruff, but still formal voice spoke in his ear. "Crowley...you came back..."

"Of course I came back! I LOVE you!"  
"But you..."  
"We have to get back to the TARDIS, get out of here!" Crowley exclaimed. He felt Aziraphale nod. "You're right. Let's go..." He stood up, gently pushing Crowley away. He let Crowley lead the way back towards the light and into the TARDIS. Once inside, Crowley could see Aziraphale's new body. He was...well, husky. He was a little taller, his belly was flatter, his muscles...oh. That was certainly different. But not unappealing. His still-short hair was blond instead of white. Other than that, his face was relatively similar.

"AZIRA-"  
"Are you kids okay?" Aziraphale moved towards the children to check them over. His movements were liquid-smooth. Gazelle - or whatever her name was - timdily spoke up. "Do YOU know where our mother is?"  
"I don't know, but I can find out. Where did you la-"  
Crowley butted in with, "We have to get out of here first!" They couldn't just sit in the stomach of a...what was it, a giant Dalek?

Aziraphale nodded again. "Of course, you're right. Where should we go?" Crowley went to the console and tapped in the coordinates for just outside the Citadel again. The glass tubes went up and down, and they landed. Crowley turned to Aziraphale and went to hold him again, but he held up his hand in protest, keeping his eyes fixed on the little kids. "Where did you last see your mother?"  
"At our house. She went to fight the Daleks."

"I'm afraid I must tell you, she probably hasn't survived." Aziraphale said it like it was nothing. Crowley stared, shocked into silence. "But I'll do the best I can to find her and bring her to you. Crowley, let's go."  
"...yes, anything you want." Crowley took his blaster in hand and followed Aziraphale outside. He walked so calmly...like he hadn't just DIED and regenerated into this...new body. He took up his blaster, holding it lazily. 

"Aziraphale, are we really-"  
"We came here to fight, Crowley. It's the whole reason we're here. Come on, we have to find their moth-"  
"We should take the kids to safety first, don't you think?"  
"...You're right. I'm so-GET DOWN!" He shoved Crowley behind a wall and fired shots into the air. Crowley landed on his head and yelled. He tried to get up, but he fell over. More shots fired, then Aziraphale was a warm presence by his side. 

Hands, softer than they looked, cupped the back of Crowley's head. "Oh, Crowley, I hurt you!" The dismay in Aziraphale's voice was palpable. Crowley sat up, with difficulty. The pain in his head was blinding. "I-I'm okay, it's just a little bump." He groaned out. Aziraphale helped him to his feet, and supported him on the way back to the TARDIS. "If I hadn't rushed in, this wouldn't have happened. I'm SORRY, Crowley." 

Now inside, Aziraphale lead Crowley to the first aid room of the TARDIS. He cleaned the wound, wrapped Crowley's head in bandadges. Used a scanner to check him for concussion. "Okay, you'll be alright. Do you think you can pilot the TARDIS? We should hurry to a safe place. Perhaps Earth would be best. Surely they have emergency childcare." 

Crowley groaned as he went to the console room and set their course for their usual Time and Place on Earth. Aziraphale used his psychic paper to quickly book into a holiday motel, while Crowley looked up 'emergency childcare' on his phone. He liked human inventions. Half an hour later, after Aziraphale had cleaned off the goo from the monster's stomach and changed into human clothes, a young woman named Sarah arrived to take care of the kids. Aziraphale made up some story for her - that his mother was in hospital or something. Crowley didn't take any of it in, he was in too much pain.

Aziraphale came back into the TARDIS and locked the door shut. He sighed a deep, heavy sigh. "You can't fight like this, but I need you to fly the TARDIS..."  
"I keep telling you, you should learn."  
"I'm...sorry, Crowley. Come on...let's go back and finish what we started." Aziraphale's newly-formed face was set. It looked frightening. Crowley couldn't bear it. "That's just it, we DIDN'T start this! It's nothing to do with us!"

"What does that have to do with it?" Aziraphale asked, genuinely confused. Crowley groaned in frustration and pain, waving his arms exasperatedly. "We aren't real Time Lords anymore! We haven't been for years! We don't have to risk our lives any more! You LITERALLY. DIED. They've taken ENOUGH from us!" He gripped Aziraphale's shoulders, only to be pushed away, a little forcefully. Aziraphale was glaring at him, looking disgusted. "I'm choosing to ignore what you just said. Take us back. NOW."

Crowley didn't want Aziraphale to threaten to hurt himself again, so he did as he was told. The TARDIS shuddered. It jolted, sending them both falling to the floor. It SHRIEKED in protest. Crowley lept up, ignoring the throb of pain in his head, and grabbed hold of the scanner. "What's the matter with you? Don't break down, please!" Four simple words came up on the screen. TIME LOCK IN PLACE. "What? How can that BE?"

"What ever is the matter?" Aziraphale demanded. Crowley shurgged and shook his head, then grabbed the handle under the console as the TARDIS rocked from side-to-side. "It says there's a Time Lock! We can't land!"  
"The whole planet?"  
Crowley pressed a few buttons. "Yes, the whole planet is under a Time Lock! The...the whole WAR is under a Time Lock! We CAN'T go back!" He bit his lip to hide his exuberant grin. They were safe. Aziraphale and his crazy deathwish were halted.

He looked crestfallen. Devastated. Aziraphale stayed where he was on the floor. He held his blaster between his hands and stared at it. "We can't help them? We can do nothing?" Crowley crouched beside him and took the blaster away, setting it down carefully on the floor. "We can do No More. I'm...um, sorry you couldn't help. But we did save those kids!"  
"Their mother was left behind. And so many other children...they're dying. Right now. Right there. And we can do nothing."

"Aziraphale, we've done all we can, and that has to be enough."  
"Everyone was at home, everyone was fighting. They're all trapped in the Time Lock. Do you know how to break a Time Lock? Do we know ANYONE who can break a Time Lock?" Aziraphale was shaking now. Crowley couldn't see his face. He took his hands, clasped them tightly. "No one can do it, angel. But...WE are safe. And we saved two lives. We've done enough."  
"Nothing will ever be enough. Never. It will just keep going, forever."

Crowley looked down at the new man in front of him. He still felt Aziraphale's energy, but he was so different. So ready to fight. He'd purposefully made this regeneration warlike. His soft, kind-hearted, peaceful bibliophile was gone. Instead he had a soldier. That thought cut through Crowley's body and twisted like a blade. The pain in his head was nothing to this. His eyes were stinging again; he was so glad of his sunglasses right now. "Aziraphale. There IS something we can do."

What he had to say next scared him, but it had to be done. For the sake of their species. For the sake of Gallifrey. For Aziraphale. "We can raise those kids. They need us now. I...I know your new body is inclined towards fighting, but maybe it can be tender, as well. Maybe it can..."  
"Be a father? Crowley, I...I don't think I can DO that..." Aziraphale's hands shook. Crowley gripped them tighter. "Do we have a choice?"  
"I...I guess not."

They sat there on the floor in silence for awhile. The sudden expectations weighed heavily on them both. Crowley wanted to run again. Run far away, take Aziraphale somewhere they could be alone forever. Somewhere they could go and be alone and relearn each other's selves. How long would it take before he saw this man and saw his Aziraphale? But they couldn't run any longer. It was over. For them, the war was over as quickly as it had began. 

"Who could even have DONE this? Set up the Time Lock?" Aziraphale whispered. Crowley didn't really care. "It can't have been the Council. They would never give up on Gallifrey like that. It must have been a disloyal Time Lord." He replied, just as quietly. He continued, "It doesn't matter right now. We should...I dunno, um..."  
"YOU should rest." Aziraphale stood up and helped Crowley to his feet for the second time. He lifted Crowley like a princess, and didn't that ever make his heart skip a beat.

Crowley was carried to their bedroom and set down gently on the bed, propped up against the pillows. Aziraphale sat beside him and stroked his hair away from his face. Big, warm hands so tender. Crowley gulped. "I can't believe what I did, Aziraphale..."  
"What did you do, dear?" Still called him that. Good. "I ran from you, I ran away and left you behind to die...!" Crowley's eyes filled with tears. Aziraphale smiled sadly. "You ran from a monster, not from me. I forgive you."

"Do you really mean that...?" Crowley turned his face away, agonised. He heard Aziraphale's sharp intake of breath. "Of course I do! I would have...I would probably have done the same." He replied, his voice strained. Crowley shook his head. "I don't believe that. You insisted on fighting, I didn't want to. You wanted to come back, I wanted to run. I left you and you were k-KILLED and it's my fault and-" He burst into tears. 

Aziraphale took his sunglasses off and set them down on the nightstand. "Crowley, I don't want to be angry at you. It's...hard, but it's not what I want. I'm choosing to forgive you because I don't want to have a fight over this. You did what any reasonable person would have done. I understand this. I understand how fear drives the average body."  
"No-not YOUR body!"  
"Perhaps not, anymore. But only because I physically made it so."

"You have nothing to be ashamed of, Crowley. And I'm choosing not to be ashamed of you. I love you too much for that. Now, please. Stop this nonsense and rest." He thought it was nonsense? "It's not...it's important to me! I need to be better! You deserve better. You deserve better than m-" Crowley was silenced by lips against his. It felt different, tasted different, but the spark of Artron energy was the same. Aziraphale broke away, cupping his cheek and rubbing his thumb against his skin. "I told you to stop." He smiled softly.

Crowley gave up. He clearly wasn't going to get anywhere with this stubborn man. Same as ever, then. "If we can't talk about that, then...can we talk about how you threatened to...um, hurt yourself?" The room went cold. Aziraphale took his hand away. "Do we really need to discuss this?"  
"Of course we do...these past few days, it's like you've had a...a deathwish." Crowley couldn't raise his voice above a shallow croak. He watched Aziraphale's face harden.

"I don't have a deathwish, I merely wished to help our people. Unlike you." Aziraphale's voice was stone cold. Crowley shrank from him. "I, I didn't...I wanted to help, but I...I don't know how to fight! YOU didn't know, until now! What could we even DO? I...we...we're not soldiers, Aziraphale." Crowley's voice trembled. He hated himself for it. He had to stand his ground, make Aziraphale see his way. Aziraphale just glared at him. "That's not the problem, anyway. The problem is that you...you might have done something...irreversable."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I have to do another chapter I think. Heh.


	3. The Binary Suns of Gallifrey

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Aziraphale and Crowley talk about stuff

“You know I wouldn’t have done it.”

“I _don’t_ know that, actually. I saw how you looked. You looked like you were going to do it.” Crowley replied in earnest. His eyes were fixed on Aziraphale’s. “Fine, I _would_ have done it. I would have.”

_“WHY?”_

“Because I was desperate, Crowley. Because I’m a Time Lord and I would have regenerated. Believe me. If I were human, I would not have dared.” With that, he embraced Crowley. His newly strong arms were warm and gentle. Crowley leaned into his touch, closing his eyes. A hand came up and removed his glasses. “I want to see your eyes…”

Crowley blinked up at Aziraphale, feeling pathetic. He didn’t want to cry in front of him, not ever. “Don’t you dare hurt yourself, angel. Not ever.”

“What if-”

“I couldn’t take it. I’d…I’d _leave_ you.” Crowley bit his lip. Aziraphale actually _smirked_. “Liar,” He said simply. Crowley nodded. “I wouldn’t leave you, not for anything…” Then Aziraphale was kissing away the tears now falling down Crowley’s face. His angel…still so loving. Still Aziraphale. He smiled weakly. “It’s going to take some time to get used to your new body, you know.” Aziraphale laughed in reply. “Is it that bad? I just wanted to be ready to fight.”

“It’s not bad. Just different.”

“Why don’t we get started now?” Aziraphale grinned wickedly.

An hour and a half later, after _getting to know each other_ , and a quick shower, Aziraphale went to pick up the kids. He brought them back to the TARDIS. They’d been taken care of well, and were ready to go to bed. Crowley watched as Aziraphale tucked them in, like he’d done it a million times before. He didn’t tell them about the Time Lock. Then Aziraphale came back to Crowley, lead him to their own room. “I wanted to wait until morning to tell them…they ought to rest.”

“I agree. I wouldn’t be able to sleep with that information.” Crowley murmured against Aziraphale’s hair. He was taller now, but still not as tall as Crowley. It was nice. “Crowley…” Aziraphale’s voice was a low groan against his shoulder. “Do you still love me?”

“Of course I do, angel.”

“Say it. _Please._ ”

“I love you, Aziraphale.”

Aziraphale respectfully asked Crowley to leave him alone for the rest of the night. He needed to be alone with his new face. Get used to any new quirks. He went into his library, looked around at the stacked shelves, and was pleased to find that the familiar feeling of love for his books hadn’t gone away. He took a copy of _Hamlet_ from the shelf and settled in to read for a few hours. Then he decided it was time for a change of pace and went to the wardrobe to find new threads. Not that he thought of them as threads – that’s just what Crowley would say. Everything he’d gathered over the years was now too big, and too short in the legs. Even his shoes didn’t fit anymore. They’d have to go shopping tomorrow. The thought was a daunting one, suddenly. He didn’t like shopping anymore. This new body _was_ different.

What would they do with the kids? Take them along? That seemed like a pain. Oh, he didn’t like children, either. Well, that was the same as before. Sticky hands, dirty faces…ugh, getting on his books. He decided the library would need a lock on it now. Or would that be bad for their development somehow? Oh, they could start a new library with children’s books in it. _Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, At the Back of the North Wind,_ perhaps _The Magician’s Apprentice._ It would be fun. Yes, he could read to them. He’d read to them each night, and Crowley would be standing in the doorway, watching lovingly…like real fathers. Only, real fathers would be married and-

 _Oh,_ that was _quite_ the idea. Why had he never thought of that before, in his old body? Maybe because while he regenerated, one of the things he had thought about was Crowley. This body was made for war, yes, but also for warmth.

How would they even get married? They weren’t citizens of _any_ world. Crowley had been an outlaw for years. They could probably go to Las Vegas, but that would be so unromantic. Well, as long as it was the two of them, it would be fine, right? Or they could use their psychic papers. Yes, that would work. Use the psychic papers to get proper identification, then get married on Earth. Outside, perhaps. That would be charming. But would Crowley even agree? They’d only been together for a few years – nothing to a Time Lord. But they loved each other, deeply. Right? Crowley had said he still loved him. Even now, in this new form. But did he love him _that much_? There was only one way to know. He’d have to get this right. Take him on a romantic dinner date, leave the kids with a baby-sitter. They’d have to book into another hotel for that – couldn’t have humans seeing the TARDIS.

Or maybe they could buy a house. Somewhere in London. Retail prices were ridiculous in London, but Crowley could afford it with his sneaky future-proof investments. Yes, they could pretend at being human. Have a home here on Earth, send the children to a human school. Go traveling amongst the stars during the Summer holidays. It was a _very_ appealing idea. Aziraphale found himself eagerly planning it all out in his mind. He spent the rest of the night thinking about it. Domestic bliss. He completely forgot to acquaint himself with his new body.

Crowley spent the night pacing, thinking about Aziraphale, thinking about their new role as caregivers. What if he screwed up? He’d never been good with kids. When he heard them playing he felt irritated at the noise. When they bumped into him on the street he thought they were stupid. He knew it wasn’t fair to think such things, but it was how his mind was inclined to work. How did Aziraphale feel about this? He seemed so at ease with them. Crowley couldn’t even remember their damn names! He just didn’t like kids. He didn’t want to be a caregiver. Let alone a father! But they had no choice. They couldn’t just put them in a human orphanage, they were Time Lords. They had certain qualities that would be asked about. What if they let slip something about Gallifrey?

They had no choice. How was this supposed to be a loving family, when they had no choice? Crowley hoped that maybe, just maybe, he could grow to love these kids as if they were his own. But he doubted it. He’d never even considered becoming a father. He wasn’t interested in women, he wasn’t interested in adoption or test tube babies or whatever. He was only ever interested in Aziraphale. All he had ever wanted was to travel in Time and Space with Aziraphale. And now, because of the Daleks, their lives had been uprooted. Those monsters…those degenerate bloody monsters had destroyed…everything he held dear. They’d killed the man he loved. Burned his home planet. Crowley couldn’t pretend to himself that he wasn’t sad about Gallifrey. It wasn’t really his home, had never been his home. But he still _loved_ it. He had to admit that now.

Before he knew it, it was late morning and the kids were awake. They must have slept in awhile – he didn’t blame them. Crowley wanted to sleep too, but it was impossible with all this stuff running through his head. He had _such_ a massive responsibility now. Aziraphale appeared and offered to make pancakes for everyone. Crowley hovered in the kitchen, watching him cook. Marvelling at the strange new way he moved. The whisk moved so fast in his hand. He could actually flip the pancakes now, instead of simply creating a mess. Crowley wanted to kiss him, but he resisted. It felt weird to do that in front of strangers, let alone children. Soon, they were sitting around the table, eating pancakes like it was normal. Crowley forced himself to eat, to keep up appearances.

“So,” Aziraphale began. “We have something important to tell you kids.” Oh no. Here it was. Aziraphale nudged Crowley under the table, asking for help. “Uh-uhm, so, it’s like this. There’s a lock. Of Time. A Time Lock, you might say. And it’s…around Gallifrey, and it means, um…” Crowley tried miserably. Aziraphale glared at him, and continued in his stead. “There is a Time Lock around Gallifrey, which means that we cannot return. I’m sorry, we cannot attempt to locate your mother.” There was a deathly silence. No tears, no screaming, no tantrums that Crowley had expected. Just a still, cold silence that seemed to last forever. “We’re sorry,” Crowley said, feeling like a fool. That’s when the tears began. Silent, but desperate tears. Finally, the girl spoke up. “We don’t blame you…”

_We don’t blame you._ It echoed in Crowley’s head for days. As they went about their business, as they went to the tailor to get new clothes for Aziraphale, as they went food shopping. _We don’t blame you._ It was his fault they hadn’t searched for their mother. Crowley’s fault. He had run away, and then he had made them leave Gallifrey and come to Earth. Now they couldn’t get back, they couldn’t fight, because of him. Their mother had probably been killed anyway, but it was still Crowley’s fault that they hadn’t even _tried_ to find her. Would he have this guilt sitting in the pit of his stomach forever? Aziraphale seemed to sense his unease, and took him aside one evening. Just held him for a long time before finally bringing it up. “You must let this go. As you said yourself, we did all we could.”

Crowley swallowed uncomfortably and leaned his head on Aziraphale’s shoulder. “But it’s my fault that those kids are alone…”

“It’s the Dalek’s fault. The Daleks did this. It most decidedly was _not_ you who did this. I promise you that.” Aziraphale murmured softly, his hand coming up to rub Crowley’s back comfortingly. “I want you to be able to move past this, my love. So that we can move on, and progress our lives.” He said gently. Crowley’s breath hitched in his chest. “Progress? Like, become better at this whole…caregiving thing?” He couldn’t bring himself to say ‘fatherhood’. Aziraphale’s chest vibrated as he chuckled. “Something along those lines, yes. I’ll tell you tomorrow. I’ve booked a hotel room and called a baby-sitter so we can go out together. Just you and me. Would you like that, my dear Crowley?”

“I’d love that.”

The next evening, they left the children with a new baby-sitter and went to the Ritz to dine. Throughout the soup course, they held hands across the table. This elicited a few odd looks from other patrons, but they didn’t care. Over the main course they gazed into each other’s eyes. Aziraphale bit his lip, turning it red. Crowley’s heart lept into his throat at the sight. Over desert course, they fed each other cake. After the meal, Aziraphale took Crowley’s hand and lead the way to…the London Eye. The site of their first quasi-date. Aziraphale used his psychic paper to get them a private compartment, and they looked out over the city, hand-in-hand. The Aziraphale pecked Crowley on the cheek and grinned.

“Do you remember that I have something to tell you?”  
“I do,” Crowley replied softly. He felt Aziraphale shiver at his words. Why would that make him shiver? Unless… _oh._

“I think it’s time, don’t you?” Aziraphale was continuing. He face was red. It was very appealing to look at. Their fingers entwined. “I know a lot of Time Lords choose not to do this, but I think it is the right course for our relationship. And, more importantly, it’s what I want. And so…I have to ask you this, in all earnestness…”

“Yes, Aziraphale.” Crowley half-lidded his eyes, gazing adoringly at his angel. His lover. His fiancé. “Hmm? You interrupted me?”

“ _Yes,_ Aziraphale. _YES._ ”

The pain from the Time War never went away. How could it? But together, they could weather any storm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Very short I know but it didn't feel right putting this as only two chapters. If anyone wants more of Time Lord Crowley and Aziraphale, please let me know. Also, I take requests (except nothing explicit please) so feel free to ask for anything! I want to write about these two, but I have trouble coming up with good ideas, obviously. 
> 
> Any comments and kudos would be WILDLY appreciated! Love you all.

**Author's Note:**

> This is a bit grim. I couldn't help it. Please leave kudos and comments, it would just make my day.


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